This is to proclaim that I've successfully made the switch from the conventional QWERTY to the much more efficient Dvorak keyboard layout. This layout has been scientifically designed keeping mind the words used in the English language. The reason for the use of QWERTY, which was to prevent the jamming of typewriter, is non-existent now. But it is just inertia that has prevented us from adopting a better system. The typing by this Dvorak layout, once perfected, is not only faster but also less stressful. Definitely worth the effort!
Cheers!
Monday, June 11, 2007
Thursday, June 07, 2007
Don't Fix if it ain't Broken!
This isn't a poem... It's more in the Hip Hop genre... So a Hip Hop rhythm will help appreciate my efforts as a lyricist!
Here we go...
Couple of days back I did something uncharacteristic,
The results of my act were surprisingly drastic!
It was supposed to be a good deed,
Instead I fell into some trouble indeed!
Let me tell ya this little tale,
I was more or less destined to fail!
In my project, work on a tool by the Big Blue,
And I’m sincere guy and that is true!
I don’t know why I decided to check for it’s update,
Strange coz I never do such a crucial mistake!
I got to know there were three interim fixes,
I installed all of them without thinking twixes!
Being overconfident by nature, thought I was the boss,
Within minutes all this arrogance went for a toss!
The tool got screwed up, my work was stalled,
I rued my decision to have this crap installed!
I tried my best to rectify this non-sense,
As expected the software defied all common sense!
Rather reluctantly I mailed my boss,
No other option but to ask for SOS!
Dawn, my boss was amazed at my achievement,
She asked Blake to help me in my predicament!
Blake was the highly skilled technical guy,
Who solved such problems in a blink of an eye!
After a couple of days of miscommunication,
Whether to reinstall or repair was Blake’s decision!
Today morning I was rather frustrated,
Work halting was one of the things I hated!
So there we were two rivals in a fight,
It was just me against the coded might!
I struck the first blow and took down it’s defenses,
I guess I was completely out of my senses!
I had to do whateva it took,
Since it was pointless sticking by the book!
After a few minutes of curses & battle,
It was time to prove my mettle!
Finally I dealt a fatal blow in desperation,
And the software gave up in exasperation!
It was all over and I was happy,
The entire episode was way too crappy!
I had finally learnt a valuable lesson,
Don’t fix if it ain't broken!
Here we go...
Couple of days back I did something uncharacteristic,
The results of my act were surprisingly drastic!
It was supposed to be a good deed,
Instead I fell into some trouble indeed!
Let me tell ya this little tale,
I was more or less destined to fail!
In my project, work on a tool by the Big Blue,
And I’m sincere guy and that is true!
I don’t know why I decided to check for it’s update,
Strange coz I never do such a crucial mistake!
I got to know there were three interim fixes,
I installed all of them without thinking twixes!
Being overconfident by nature, thought I was the boss,
Within minutes all this arrogance went for a toss!
The tool got screwed up, my work was stalled,
I rued my decision to have this crap installed!
I tried my best to rectify this non-sense,
As expected the software defied all common sense!
Rather reluctantly I mailed my boss,
No other option but to ask for SOS!
Dawn, my boss was amazed at my achievement,
She asked Blake to help me in my predicament!
Blake was the highly skilled technical guy,
Who solved such problems in a blink of an eye!
After a couple of days of miscommunication,
Whether to reinstall or repair was Blake’s decision!
Today morning I was rather frustrated,
Work halting was one of the things I hated!
So there we were two rivals in a fight,
It was just me against the coded might!
I struck the first blow and took down it’s defenses,
I guess I was completely out of my senses!
I had to do whateva it took,
Since it was pointless sticking by the book!
After a few minutes of curses & battle,
It was time to prove my mettle!
Finally I dealt a fatal blow in desperation,
And the software gave up in exasperation!
It was all over and I was happy,
The entire episode was way too crappy!
I had finally learnt a valuable lesson,
Don’t fix if it ain't broken!
Sunday, June 03, 2007
Keep Safe Distance
I was standing in the ATM queue today evening waiting for my turn. I was due to go in next into the glass cabin. The person ahead of me, who was in the ATM at that time, was a 50-odd year old average type of guy. Since he was taking a really long time and I was in a bit of a rush myself, I peeped in to look what was taking so long! The guy inside gives me a really suspicious look and tries to cover up the card or whatever. So I just look away and give the guy his space!
I start thinking this is probably the only occasion which evokes such a reaction. I mean how often have you seen people cover up their grocery when you have a look to see how long the person in front of you would be taking or people rushing to cover up their suitcases while checking in for a flight or covering up their food while waiting for their turn at a marriage buffet!
It did seem like an exception!
But then suddenly it struck me like a bolt of lightening this wasnt a singular occurance of such reaction. Though I hadnt had a first hand experience of such a thing but I could almost visualise this thing happening!
When people are waiting for their turn at a public urinal... Yep! You got the picture... I wont elaborate any more!
Then I came to a conclusion... Whenever people are using something they have to remove from their pants they become conscious of peeping toms... So I guess when you're standing in a queue which involves removing stuff from pants you should keep safe distance, I would advice minimum 6 feet!!
Cheers!
I start thinking this is probably the only occasion which evokes such a reaction. I mean how often have you seen people cover up their grocery when you have a look to see how long the person in front of you would be taking or people rushing to cover up their suitcases while checking in for a flight or covering up their food while waiting for their turn at a marriage buffet!
It did seem like an exception!
But then suddenly it struck me like a bolt of lightening this wasnt a singular occurance of such reaction. Though I hadnt had a first hand experience of such a thing but I could almost visualise this thing happening!
When people are waiting for their turn at a public urinal... Yep! You got the picture... I wont elaborate any more!
Then I came to a conclusion... Whenever people are using something they have to remove from their pants they become conscious of peeping toms... So I guess when you're standing in a queue which involves removing stuff from pants you should keep safe distance, I would advice minimum 6 feet!!
Cheers!
Saturday, June 02, 2007
Hollywood Sequels and Wheat Trading!
Hollywood studios have always been fascinated by making sequels, trilogies, franchisees. Just to name a few, Matrix, Jurassic Park, Godfather, Lord of the Rings, Ocean's (11,12,13), Pirates of the Caribbean, Shrek, Indiana Jones, Star Wars, Star Wars Prequel, Back to the Future, Spiderman, Harry Potter, James Bond and the list goes on and on! Lets refer to this entire category of films (sequels, trilogies and franchisees) as sequels for ease of reference.
The reason is for making sequels is a practical no-brainer! There is already a existing, firm and at times cult like following for the first movie then why not cash in, add in some more glitz and masala, more special effects, (supposedly) more entertaining storyline, an excellent PR campaign calling it the "Best Ever", a well made teaser campaign and there you have it...!!
Not many sequels are actually planned... The success of the first film more often than not inspires the next.
In my opinion sequels are a failure in principle but a successful ploy in fooling the audience. A failure because hardly any does justice to theme and the thought behind the main movie. Or even worse it has the same old antics repackaged... But yet we find that they're a commercial success on most occasions. It is probabaly the single most guaranteed way to earn a million dollar profit.
It brings us to a very important principle in economics... Law of Diminishing Returns!
The sequels are hit and badly at that by this law. The law of diminishing returns states that at every consequent attempt a higher amount of effort is required to achieve the same level of output. So for example if a farmer in Punjab gets an output of one ton of wheat from a kilogram of planted seeds on a piece of land, he'll have to put in more than a kilogram of seeds to get the second ton from the same piece of land.
Now lets see how it relates to our sequel problem. The studios need to spend considerably more amount of money in coming up with a story that (atleast in theory) surpasses the original, have to pay the actors a much higher sum, have to spend a bomb on special effects, PR and marketing takes practically sinks them. And inspite of all this most sequels face sub-par reviews. So there you have it a much much higher effort for a sub-par job!
Inspite of this how is record for the the highest grossing film shattered so often by a sequel. (They sometimes even win Academy Awards for it, which is yet another myth to be busted some other day!) The answer too lies in the wheat economy of Punjab.
Each year the ticket prices for movies are sky rocketing. The number of viewers of the movies is increasing with more screens each year, add to that the ever increasing target population of 16-60 in most cases. I haven't even factored in the anticipation, hype and cult following! So that's where the profits come from in reality. The sequels dont make money because they're great but they make money the same way the farmer in Punjab makes it... By being wise enough to understand the demand-supply economics and adjusting the price in such a way that the extra efforts for the second ton of wheat are actually justified!
Cheers!
The reason is for making sequels is a practical no-brainer! There is already a existing, firm and at times cult like following for the first movie then why not cash in, add in some more glitz and masala, more special effects, (supposedly) more entertaining storyline, an excellent PR campaign calling it the "Best Ever", a well made teaser campaign and there you have it...!!
Not many sequels are actually planned... The success of the first film more often than not inspires the next.
In my opinion sequels are a failure in principle but a successful ploy in fooling the audience. A failure because hardly any does justice to theme and the thought behind the main movie. Or even worse it has the same old antics repackaged... But yet we find that they're a commercial success on most occasions. It is probabaly the single most guaranteed way to earn a million dollar profit.
It brings us to a very important principle in economics... Law of Diminishing Returns!
The sequels are hit and badly at that by this law. The law of diminishing returns states that at every consequent attempt a higher amount of effort is required to achieve the same level of output. So for example if a farmer in Punjab gets an output of one ton of wheat from a kilogram of planted seeds on a piece of land, he'll have to put in more than a kilogram of seeds to get the second ton from the same piece of land.
Now lets see how it relates to our sequel problem. The studios need to spend considerably more amount of money in coming up with a story that (atleast in theory) surpasses the original, have to pay the actors a much higher sum, have to spend a bomb on special effects, PR and marketing takes practically sinks them. And inspite of all this most sequels face sub-par reviews. So there you have it a much much higher effort for a sub-par job!
Inspite of this how is record for the the highest grossing film shattered so often by a sequel. (They sometimes even win Academy Awards for it, which is yet another myth to be busted some other day!) The answer too lies in the wheat economy of Punjab.
Each year the ticket prices for movies are sky rocketing. The number of viewers of the movies is increasing with more screens each year, add to that the ever increasing target population of 16-60 in most cases. I haven't even factored in the anticipation, hype and cult following! So that's where the profits come from in reality. The sequels dont make money because they're great but they make money the same way the farmer in Punjab makes it... By being wise enough to understand the demand-supply economics and adjusting the price in such a way that the extra efforts for the second ton of wheat are actually justified!
Cheers!
Friday, June 01, 2007
Sing a song whole day long!
I’ve had one song stuck in my head all day long… I don’t know how it got into the complex system of neurons and dendrons and now I’ve been through the entire day and I’m still humming it, singing it, it keeps playing in my mind on and on and on…
The song… “In dino…. Dil mera… mujhse hai… keh raha…. Tu…. Khwaab sajaa… Tu... jee le jaraa... hain tujhe bhi ijjazat karle tu bhi mohabbat….” from Life in a Metro. I just sang that line all the way and now it has gone onto the next para!
I’m not a music freak to an extent that songs get stuck in my mind… I listen to songs n all but it aint no passion! I don’t watch the stupid music talent shows on television featuring some on the worst monkey crap imaginable! I can largely be classified in the category of bathroom singers but that too quite silently… I used to play instruments but never really was addicted or anything! I was more like the hobby kind of a playing… I enjoyed that but it didn’t consume me!
I got no clue why this song keeps playing on and on and on… It’s not even like this is the first time I’ve heard the song for the first time… I haven't seen the movie and have no idea whom it was picturised on or other details... It's not really my favourite song either... It’s been around for I guess over a month now… I got no problem as such with it being stuck other than the fact that I’ll just keep wondering why why why why!!!
While at work, during lunch, tea, on the way back home... Over and over again... I even tried listening to other songs or watching something on TV... Phew!
I’m someone who cant rest until I can find reasons, until I figure out mysteries, until I can find out the W’s of everything!! I’m ok with ambiguity if I have some pre-conceived notion or an idea or some weird feeling about what’s happening which is enough to pacify me momentarily but this is... strange!
Don’t even go down the road of forming an hypothesis that the song is suggesting me something and by some divine interaction it got stuck in my mind… coz it’s nothing like my life right now! My zindagi isn’t berang… I’ve probably hit a purple patch I have been waiting for ages… I have my mohabbat in order and it's rocking… Touchwood! I have been sajaving khwaab about everything from the time I remember… a really dreamy optimist to be frank! The song doesnt relate to me even a bit!
Well… cant help it… I guess this will stay around until I guess something better to chew on…
Tu.... Khwaab saja.... Tu jee le jaraa!!
Cheers!
The song… “In dino…. Dil mera… mujhse hai… keh raha…. Tu…. Khwaab sajaa… Tu... jee le jaraa... hain tujhe bhi ijjazat karle tu bhi mohabbat….” from Life in a Metro. I just sang that line all the way and now it has gone onto the next para!
I’m not a music freak to an extent that songs get stuck in my mind… I listen to songs n all but it aint no passion! I don’t watch the stupid music talent shows on television featuring some on the worst monkey crap imaginable! I can largely be classified in the category of bathroom singers but that too quite silently… I used to play instruments but never really was addicted or anything! I was more like the hobby kind of a playing… I enjoyed that but it didn’t consume me!
I got no clue why this song keeps playing on and on and on… It’s not even like this is the first time I’ve heard the song for the first time… I haven't seen the movie and have no idea whom it was picturised on or other details... It's not really my favourite song either... It’s been around for I guess over a month now… I got no problem as such with it being stuck other than the fact that I’ll just keep wondering why why why why!!!
While at work, during lunch, tea, on the way back home... Over and over again... I even tried listening to other songs or watching something on TV... Phew!
I’m someone who cant rest until I can find reasons, until I figure out mysteries, until I can find out the W’s of everything!! I’m ok with ambiguity if I have some pre-conceived notion or an idea or some weird feeling about what’s happening which is enough to pacify me momentarily but this is... strange!
Don’t even go down the road of forming an hypothesis that the song is suggesting me something and by some divine interaction it got stuck in my mind… coz it’s nothing like my life right now! My zindagi isn’t berang… I’ve probably hit a purple patch I have been waiting for ages… I have my mohabbat in order and it's rocking… Touchwood! I have been sajaving khwaab about everything from the time I remember… a really dreamy optimist to be frank! The song doesnt relate to me even a bit!
Well… cant help it… I guess this will stay around until I guess something better to chew on…
Tu.... Khwaab saja.... Tu jee le jaraa!!
Cheers!
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